Monday, October 1, 2012

Why Being Selfish Is a Good Thing - Selfish Motivation Application

    Selfishness is shunned by everybody, however, how many will be willingly sacrifice their reputation and love from close ones to accomplish something very significant? Very little. None of this is supposed to make sense, because I write only nonsense.

    Selfishness is such harsh and cruel word. The reason is because it has so many negative connotations attached to it. Is selfishness wrong? That really depends on how well you can make yourself live. If you are truly happy deep to the core, then your selfishness is the right path. If there's even ONE bit of hesitation you can feel that is MORE significant than YOUR strongest selfishness, then of course it is wrong. Sometimes we aren't always very clear as to whether following or going against our own selfishness is the right choice. That really depends on what you are giving up for that dedication.

    When you follow your truth selfish motivation, the obviously you have to sacrifice something. However, most of us in society has made a very big mistake. We usually sacrifice something that is even MORE important than our "current selfish motivation". What I mean by that is that the current selfish motivation you follow might actually be wrong, or the methods you use to carry it out is wrong. The most common example is to sacrifice "love for career". This example can stem out three variations of selfish motivations.

    First selfish motivation is that the "pursuer" of career really does feel that love is practically insignificant. They simply pursue their career because they don't really care if they sacrifice "love" or not. In other words, the "passionate" relationship didn't contain as much "love" as the separated couples believed it had. This type of selfish motivation is definitely correct, but everybody usually end their relationship the wrong way. The couples most likely stayed together based on the wrong foundation, or their individual growth in terms of their selfish motivation and comfort pocket has diverged so separation is definitely right. However, society has a tendency to push couples to stay together because the relationship "existed" in the first place. If the relationship is broken then it will seem like a "loss" or a "pity". For this specific example, there is really no loss at risk here, because with the two individuals developing their own ways, their companionship simply won't help reinforce each other, but in fact end up destroying each other in complicated ways.

    Second selfish motivation for pursuing career over their love one is because the pursuer is "afraid" of the relationship. I don't mean that there is real fear of the partner. I mean that the pursuer is afraid that the relationship is unstable, and fear being hurt, so action is taken immediately to remove their presence quickly with a very genuine excuse. For our scenario that excuse would be their "career". This type of selfish motivation is definitely wrong if the relationship is broken simply because of that fear. The reason is because the one who avoids the pain from the relationship most likely treats it with great significance. The significance is so great that they have to find something to "numb" themselves from any pain. If a relationship is significant then obviously it shouldn't be given up. There's no reason not to pursue your relationship along with your career, unless you try REALLY hard to think of a reason.

    Third selfish motivation for pursuing career over their love one is because their has been extreme outside influence. That outside influence might have been natural disasters, authorities like law, parents, higher ups, friends, family, etc. In other words, there has been direct interference in the relationship causing altered beliefs to exist. This situation is a little complicated, because we usually aren't very clear about our true selfish motivation. For example, do you continue to love someone simply because there's an external "force" stopping you? Or do you truly love someone for who they really are and they way the complement you. If these two aren't distinguished clearly, then the victim pursuing their career will always regret their sacrifice causing complications. If you are regretting your sacrifice simply because oppression is involved, then pursuing your career might be the right path. If you regret because you have found THE most significant part of your life, then pursuing your career is definitely WRONG.

    The above example is to help you clarify your true selfish motivation. Just because you are stubborn about your current selfish motivation doesn't make it right. You can make it very clear to yourself by stripping off comfort pockets that has burdened your selfish motivation. First question you should ask yourself is, "is what you are currently doing the most exciting and happy thing you can do in your entire life?". If the answer is a definite yes with no hesitations or logic explanations, then congratulations, you have just found the most important thing in your life to dedicate all your life source to. However, if there's even a tiny little doubt, then you will have to be a little careful. There's two reasons you will hesitate.

    First reason is that the current thing you feel you "should be" most excited about is really not what you want to do in life. Second reason is that their are burdening factors obstructing your excitement for your current selfish motivation.

    If your problem is the first reason, then give up your "fake" selfish motivation and pursue your real one by looking deep inside yourself for answers. If you can not do that, then I am very sorry. It's your decision, so it's really entirely up to you. The best advice I can give you is to let all your comfort pockets for your current goal mastered so that you can repetitively do it for the rest of your in automation, without your conscious input. Don't worry, you can probably still be somewhat creative, because comfort pocket can form comfort pocket arms that latches onto new ideas and methods.

    If your problem is the second one, then you will have to clear our your burdening factors. Lets say for example you want to be a sculptor. However, you heard that being a sculptor doesn't earn you much money. Somehow others have also convinced you that there's no way you can market yourself to make it profitable. You also have been convinced by others that your skills will never reach "master" level, and you are only "playing around". These burdening factors might have already become a comfort pocket of yours. You can no longer get rid of it, but you can override them. If you heard that being a sculptor doesn't earn money, then figure out ways to prove that theory wrong. Sure, those people are part of the minority, because when we say minority we mean two to three percent of the population. If you think about the human population on earth going up to eight billion people, then it comes down to 100 million people. If you think about it carefully, two to three percent is actually a LOT of people. Usually what others mean by minority doesn't mean that most of us CAN'T do it, it simply means we don't WANT to do it. I know you most likely don't want to be a sculptor, but you can fill in the blanks of the above example with details from your own personal life.

    Follow your selfish motivation seriously benefits society as a whole. First of all, you know you what you are sacrificing, and you know what you are aiming for, so society doesn't need to take care of you with extra special efforts. Second of all, you are doing something important that nobody will do FOR you, and of course nobody will figure it out for you either. Third of all, you are doing what YOU want to do in your life, so you will never be jealous, or hate others because you are focusing on your favorite thing in life. However, if others accomplishments or existence can distract you even a little, then you either didn't get rid of all your burdening factors, or you are following a fake selfish motivation. If that's the case, FIX IT and think again. Fourth of all, you will be known as an intelligent one because none of the details will escape your eye when you are one hundred focused on what you are doing. You can be that focused, because you love doing it, and society will advance because of YOU. Others will also make society advance if they follow their selfish motivation, and now you are one of them. Fifth of all, you won't commit evil anymore. Seriously, if you are really very clear about your truth selfish motivation in life, then you won't commit evil. Why? Evil comes from confusion. You will no longer need to terrorize others because you always feel frustrated, because your feelings are all focused on your goal. You won't be distracted by others who try to convince you otherwise, because your feelings are all focused on your goal. I wish you good luck in finding your true selfish motivation. Hopefully, you one of those with ideas to save the world. Good luck.

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