Hey, another set of nonsense about myself. You sure enjoy nonsense if you are still reading :). Congrats! I guess I can like you after all if you were a person I know (no, not that way). This one is pretty "emo" too, according to the dictionary of biasing. Like I mentioned before, can you understand how I feel without screaming for mommy? How much of this can you relate to your life? We are both living creatures, but how much difference sets us apart? It makes me wonder.... If you have anything to say then please don't hesitate to leave a comment below.
I'm a loner, barely someone with any emotions, but I can feel happy when others are happy. I can be considered some sort of emotional leech. But I feel happy nevertheless, so the names simply categorizes different forms of criticism that has no meaning here whatsoever.
Being a loner is almost destined, yet most people consider it under control of the individual. Depending on how you look at it, I don't believe so. People act according to their comfort pocket, so any social interactions is completely original, therefore you won't talk be talking to one or two million twins that imitate your thoughts and behaviors as you try to move on with your life. People want to feel and be special, not become the same monotonous "thing" as everybody else. However, to escape the zone of a loner, you have to give up your current comfort pocket, enlarge it with unnecessary amounts of social fashion craze, and go with the "flow", if you can really call it that.
I decided to truly be who I think I am, which is surprisingly randomly changing from time to time. Yet, in the end, I'm still eccentric beyond and normal living thing's wildest imaginations. I don't want to hang out with anybody just because I wan them to be there. I want to be there with them too. It's pointless if my body and my mind somehow gets separated.
Being so original as a person, barely anything in this world can shock except for subjects related to death and torture. There's also this extra little problem I'll never be able to surpass; care. There's this person I took care of for a long time. My comfort pocket always stored the belief that this certain individual finds me impressive and takes my existence as a role model. Fate plays with your mind at the worst moments. This person said something I'll never forget, because I'll never forgive myself for hearing it. These words might finally seal ice that holds my heart in chains. If that sounds too rhetoric for you, then I guess I can reveal to you what those certain words are. It was, "you're so useless" in a whisper, out of that individual's mouth. If another person said it, I would've brushed it off because my normal eccentric attitude does give off that air of ignorance, but when this individual said it, my comfort pocket for my beliefs in this person's faith finally got popped, or should I say, "destroyed".
I haven't gone insane yet, which fortunately is because this comfort pocket is far from being my actual backbone. If it was my backbone of comfort pockets, then you would find me in a mental institution right now, instead of typing this up for you to read. The words are painful, because it gave me a one hundred eighty degrees change in direction in my beliefs that supports my attitude towards this world. Now that it has been altered, I keep seeing images of a certain world where I can possibly exist in. In this world, a certain being of higher existence appears and gives me two choices to make; to escape or to stay. If I choose to escape, then my memories, and others memories of my existence will be erased. If I choose to stay, then I'll have to take reality the hard way and eat up my troubles. If this moment of choice appeared, I wonder which choice I'll take up.
Most people like to take revenge on the ones they love, which will hopefully open the eyes of those they care about, and understand them back in return. Total dramatic movie junk to me. If anybody absorbed that into their comfort pocket, I can guarantee you will discard it because what you wish for doesn't exist. However, I do believe that if people can just return to the source of the problem, when and why comfort pocket was created to counter your biggest problems, I'm sure there will be a solution some day.
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